Ubisoft partners with some, uh, ambitious folks

The Michael Fassbender (Fish Tank) ledAssassin’s Creedmovie isn’t out until December, which is a long time from now, kind of. But that doesn’t mean that Ubisoft doesn’t want to start selling you tickets right this minute. $1,200 tickets.

I mean, how else didThe DivisionbecomeUbisoft’s best-selling launchto date?

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“Long before theAssassin’s Creedtrailer premieres and nine months before the movie’s debut, Kernel’s is offering passionate fans of the franchise a first look of key elements from the film, including the hoodie and gauntlet worn by Callum Lynch’s/Aguilar (played by Michael Fassbender), limited-edition collectibles, apparel and accessories, the film script, advanced movie tickets, tickets to San Diego Comic Con and more.”

What else more? Well, “packages range from $15 to $1200,” and on the high end you get, “an exact 1:1 scale replica” of the “15th century crossbow” from the film. Only 20 of them are being made and each has a letter certifying its authenticity as a replica of a fake old weapon. You also get a digital copy of the movie script.

Superman, Elio, and Glordon all looking up

Look, I’m not going to tell rich people how to spend their money. Go ahead and drop $3,000/month on candles while the rest of us struggle to make rent. You’ll only be that much sweeter-smelling when we eat you. But I do recommend instead a double feature of13 Assassinsand that newCreedmovie. Or even Sylvester Stallone and Antonio Banderas’Assassinsand a Creed (band) album.

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